


Spectrum

by Snarry5evr



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Friends to Lovers, M/M, Post-War, song!fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-07
Updated: 2017-12-18
Packaged: 2019-01-30 14:41:58
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 16,561
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12655575
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Snarry5evr/pseuds/Snarry5evr
Summary: The spectrum of our lives play out in the colors around us.





	1. White- snowy, milky, ivory.

**Author's Note:**

> So I've been wanting to write a song fic for a while now but nothing really struck me as "Snarry" until I was listening to "Black" by Dierks Bently and the fic just wrote itself. Each chapter is a different song (I'll try to include a link to the version I listened to as I wrote each chapter). Just a warning to my regular readers; this is nothing like my normal writing style but I hope you still like it.

    **White - snowy, milky, ivory**

[Big White Room by Jessi J](https://youtu.be/EeJSK9ebyu8)

_Sitting in a big white room alone_  
_Tilt my head back, feel the tears fall down_  
_Close my eyes to see in the dark_  
_I feel young, broken, so, so scared_  
_I don't wanna be here anymore_  
_I wanna be somewhere else_  
_Normal and free, like I used to be_  
_But I have to stay in this big white room_  
_With little old me_

 

Harry gathered his royal blue formal robes around him, and sat down, wishing he was anywhere but here. No, that wasn’t true. There was really only one place he wished to be. He was so sick of these damn Ministry functions. They had been better when they’d been held at Hogwarts directly after the Final Battle. At least there it was easy to get lost. Harry looked around the stark white walls of the Ministry waiting room. At least he’d found a quiet place to hide for a few minutes, even if the sterile walls reminded him of another place. He leaned his head back, and closed his eyes against the blinding starkness. Memories from that other place filled him. The hideous _thing_ half hidden beneath a bench, Dumbledore, dead over a year, speaking to him of choices, the knowledge that he wouldn’t be joining his parents that day. Then coming back, only to face the reality of more deaths that were not his own. And now, they wished to celebrate.

To celebrate that gruesome day when all Harry wanted was to go. To hide. To once more be the innocent child walking through the doors of the Great Hall, listening to his future friend explain about magical ceilings. To once again feel the joys of soaring through the sky on his broom, chasing after the snitch, not fleeing for his life. But those days were gone. Now his days were spent in rooms like these: white, stark, sterile. But this was not the room he wished to be in.

 

_I'm going crazy_  
_I'm losing my mind_  
_I'm going crazy_  
_In this big white room of mine_  
_I'm going crazy_  
_I'm losing my mind_  
_I'm going crazy_  
_In this big white room of mine_

Sometimes he wondered if he _was_ as barmy as Ron accused him of being. What kind of person spent night after night sitting by the bedside of a comatose man that had hated them? What insanity drew him to visit that private room in St. Mungo’s? What kind of delusions kept him hoping for a different outcome every time he stepped through that wooden door?  It had been over a year since they’d pulled the bleeding body from the shack, and still, Harry wished, hoped, waited for Snape to wake up. To explain. To yell. To tell Harry he was an idiot. To… anything. To just do _something_ . Harry scoffed. Did he seriously, foolishly expect Snape to throw his arms around Harry and thank Merlin he was safe? To admit he’d never really hated Harry? Perhaps Harry _was_ a bit unhinged.

 

_Sitting in a big white room alone_  
_Close the door_  
_Don't want the pain to come in_  
_I clench my fist_  
_And try to stay strong_  
_I cry, feel sick_  
_My heart is beating out of control_  
_Can I run run faster than you_  
_I wanna feel my body again_  
_Feel the wind in my hair_  
_But I have to stay in this big white room_  
_'Cause no one else cares, no_

 

His eyes fluttered open to reveal awful, white walls. The effect blinding him, and shooting needle-like pain through his head. This wasn’t the only pain, he realized. His throat felt rough and scratchy, his neck was stiff, every muscle on his left side cried out with even the thought of movement. Severus tried to sit up, but his body was too weak. He knew immediately he must be at St. Mungo’s, but what did that mean? Had they won? Had the Dark Lord won, and, in a moment of charity, sent Severus to the Healers? He clenched his right fist and fought against the pain, trying to clear his head. Trying to remember. He remembered the sure knowledge that the Dark Lord was on his way to the school. His desperate search for Potter. Fear pounded through him. Had he ever gotten to Potter? He remembered the summons from the Dark Lord, Lucius frantic to get him to ‘their master.’ He remembered something about the man’s wand, but he hadn’t been concentrating. All he could think of was getting to Potter. To escape this mad man’s rantings and run. Run as fast as he could to save the only person that mattered. In the end, _had_ it even mattered? Had Potter lived? Had Potter faced down the mad man that had haunted him almost nearly from the day of his birth? Severus stared at the white walls of his room, but no answers came to him.

 

_I'm going crazy_  
_I'm losing my mind_  
_I'm going crazy_  
_In this big white room of mine_  
_I'm going crazy_  
_I'm losing my mind_  
_I'm going crazy_  
_In this big white room of mine_

He woke again some time later. An hour, five hours, mere minutes. He had no way of knowing in this white-washed prison. He could easily go crazy with nothing to do but stare at these insufferable walls. A memory tugged at him, and he reached for it, jumped into the deep recesses of his convoluted mind and grasped with mental hands to drag it forward. Green eyes staring at him warily, frantic words, whispered demands. His memories. He’d given memories to Potter. But what memories? Had the boy finally understood about his deep friendship with Lily? Had he understood the desperate insanity Snape had gone through when he’d realized what the prophecy meant? Did Potter see the crippling paranoia with which he’d approached Dumbledore all those years ago? Did he understand at all the madness that Severus’s life had been for so, so long? What other memories might he have forced on the boy? He’d been weak, delirious, unable to completely control the spell that freed his memories. Did Potter see more than Severus had meant for him to? Did he now know Severus’s foolish secret? The disturbing depravity he had held close to his heart for over two years? Perhaps he was as moonstruck as Lupin, but he hugged his preposterous hope that all would be well close to his heart.

 

_Everybody's looking at me_  
_Everybody's staring at me_  
_What do I do now_  
_Smile, yeah_  
_Everybody's looking at me_  
_Everybody's staring at me_  
_What do I do now_  
_Smile, yeah_

 

“Harry?” Harry opened his eyes, and looked up at the bright face of his friend, almost highlighted by the stark white of the walls. “It’s time.”

Harry gave a nod, and stood. He stepped out into the hallway, and made his way down the corridor, the only sound the echo of their dragonhide boots on the marble floor. Ron pushed the door to the large Ministry ballroom opened, and Harry stepped through. Immediately, all eyes were on him. His breath caught in a moment of panic as he forgot his lines.

“Just smile politely,” Hermione’s soft voice whispered in his ear, and he nodded.

He smiled thankfully at his friend and turned to face the room.  
He smiled politely at the crowd as he made his way forward.  
He smiled thinly at the line of reporters as he passed.  
He smiled graciously at the Minister as Kingsley welcomed him to the stage.  
He smiled nervously as he stood in front of the podium and looked out at the crowd.  
He smiled softly as he proclaimed of the bravery of the man they were here to honor.  
He smiled wistfully as he disclosed of a lost love and second chances.  
He smiled ironically as he conceded to house loyalties and prejudices.  
He smiled pleadingly as he begged for understanding, not acceptance.  
He smiled fiercely as he proclaimed innocence and rewards for a life almost lost.  
He beamed as the crowd clapped their approval.  
He smiled sadly as Kingsley handed him the large medallion so like his own save the name.  
Finally, he smiled in relief as he stepped from the podium and was able to make his way to a back table to relax.

 

_I'm going crazy_  
_I'm losing my mind_  
_I'm going crazy_  
_In this big white room of mine_  
_I'm going crazy_  
_I'm losing my mind_  
_I'm going crazy_  
_In this big white room of mine_

 

Watching the crowd mingle around the room he wondered how long he could sit here before going stir-crazy. How long until he was itching under his skin to get away from all these people? It was illogical, he knew, to prefer the quiet bedside of a pale, sleeping figure to these people he (mostly) called friends. There was no sane excuse for whatever absurd need drove him to stare at the over-large nose, stroke the long, potion stained fingers, or wish to press his lips to the pale, sallow cheek. Utter madness, stark raving lunacy, to have fallen in love with a man he barely understood, and who most likely hated him. He tucked the unbelievable nonsense deep into his heart, and caught sight of Neville and Luna as they danced across the floor. Harry snorted, and wondered if maybe they shouldn’t be calling him Loony.

 

_I'm going crazy_  
_I'm losing my mind_  
_I'm going crazy_  
_In this big white room of mine_  
_I'm going crazy_  
_I'm losing my mind_  
_I'm going crazy_  
_In this big white room of mine_

 

No answers. He could have been lying here for days, hours, or minutes. It didn’t matter. He still had no answers. Staring at the opalescent sheen of the door did not produce a Healer no matter how much he wished it. Glaring at the chalky white of the walls did not create a window no matter how much he needed to know if it was night or day. Very little sound came through the doors, so he concluded it must be night, as he had no doubt the halls would be filled with that certain sort of hysteria that only a hospital corridor could if it were daytime. He wondered, not for the first time and certainly fruitlessly, what time it was. How long would he have to sit here with only his chaotic thoughts for company before someone came to check on him? Did they still check on him? He could have been out for years for all he knew, a long forgotten memento of an era best forgotten. The pawn of two madmen. Who would wish him to rejoin the living? He gave a sigh, and pressed his head back against his pillow. It was insanity to continue this line of thinking. He needed to do something productive. Try to move his body, work his throat, anything to pass the time. There was a soft sound and his head jerked up as the door finally, slowly opened. He waited expectantly for someone in green robes to step through and tell him what was going on, but as the door opened and the figure stepped through, all he saw was blue.


	2. Blue- Sky, azure, navy

#  **Blue - Sky, azure, navy**

[ (Blue Moon by Ella Fitzgerald) ](https://youtu.be/dqwSde_eEv4)

 

__ Blue moon you saw me standing alone  
Without a dream in my heart  
Without a love of my own 

 

Harry breathed a sigh of relief as he stepped outside the Ministry building. He slid into the shadows and pressed his back against the wall, laying his head back against the cool bricks. He was so tired of all the simpering masses and fawning idiots. If tonight hadn’t been so important, he would have found some reason to skip. He reached a hand up to press his fingers against the bulge in his pocket and sighed. His eyes focused on the hazy half-moon reflected in the window across from him. Between the evening fog and the window’s design the moon had a distinctive blue coloring, a pale imitation of his robes. Robes! He cast a quick glamour over his clothes, and pushed away from the wall. He could have Flooed, but he hadn’t wanted anyone to overhear his destination. Ron and Hermione would, of course, know where to find him. George would guess correctly, and the other Weasleys would assume. Tomorrow he’d join them for Sunday brunch, and a few of them would give him that odd look. Molly might casually mention a fellow she’d run into this evening, Ginny would mention some bloke on her Quidditch team with that gleam in her eyes, Fleur might even mention some wizard or other she had gone to school with. All to the same end. To try to get Harry’s mind off Snape and his “crush.” It was no use, though, and they didn’t understand. Hadn’t he already tried to get his mind off the man? He’d pushed the disturbing thoughts from his head for months. When he could no longer deny his feelings towards the man, Harry decided to allow his friends to set him up just to take his mind off Snape. He’d dated, snogged, and half-heartedly flirted with other men until the one time he’d felt comfortable enough with one of them to go further than he’d ever been before. But, even as his robes fell to the floor, it had felt wrong. The man was too short, his nose too small, his lips too plump, hair too cropped. And when the man had slid short, stubby fingers up Harry’s naked thigh it was too much. Harry had backed away, shaking his head, apologizing as he pulled his robe back on, making a mortified and hasty exit. He’d gone straight to the hospital and sat for hours, staring at Snape, finally admitting defeat.

 

__ Blue moon, you knew just what I was there for  
You heard me saying a prayer for  
Someone I really could care for 

 

He didn’t know how, or even when, it happened. He’d viewed the memories twice more before making a copy of the relevant ones for the Wizengamot, trying to understand what had motivated the man he thought had hated him. He begged McGonagall to allow him entrance to the man’s personal space: his office and quarters, trying to understand this stranger he’d known for seven years. There were so few personal possessions in the man’s quarters and fewer still in his office. Harry had learned nothing. Until he’d picked up a potions journal one day while helping McGonagall move some things out of the Headmaster’s office to make room for her own things. As he flipped through the magazine he’d caught sight of a familiar scrawl, and he was transported back to sixth year.  The Snape that had written in this journal was much the same as the Prince he’d come to know and think of as a friend. His comments were a bit more terse but filled with the same snark. Harry had read through the journal three times before slipping back into Snape’s quarters and finding more. Just as he’d suspected, these back issues, too, were covered in red scrawl. It seemed not even learned witches and wizards were safe from the Potion Master’s quill. In preparation for the trial, Harry had spoken to people that had known Snape. The other professors, Hagrid, the Malfoys, students he had protected the year before, past Slytherins who remembered him, if not fondly, at least with some respect. And somewhere along the way, he had come to see the man in a new way. And fallen in love. He’d gotten into the habit of stopping by the hospital every evening. Sometimes he stayed for over an hour; sometimes he was barely there ten minutes. Regardless, it became imperative he see the man, speak to the still form, reassure him that someone wanted him awake. Even if the man would only wake to tell Harry to bugger off, it would be enough for Harry.

 

__And then there suddenly appeared before me  
The only one my arms will ever hold  
I heard somebody whisper "Please adore me"  
And when I looked, the moon had turned to gold!

 

He still remembered the night the words had slipped from his lips. He had had a frustrating day. The last day of Snape’s trial, all that was left was waiting for the decision. And the reporters had been hounding him, dogging his every step until he’d almost been ready to pull out his invisibility cloak. He’d slipped into Snape’s room and practically collapsed into the chair beside the man’s bed. He’d sat there, Merlin knew how long, with his hands over his face as he fought to calm himself, to control the whirling of his mind. When he’d finally lowered his hands he’d simply stared at the beloved face. Following the contours with his eyes, the dips and swells now so familiar to him. And then he started to speak softly, telling the man about his trial, the evidence and character witnesses brought forth, how even Hermione thought Snape stood a chance of waking up a free man. And then Harry had said the words out loud for the first time.

“I love you. Merlin help me, but I do.”

He’d known Snape probably hadn’t changed. Was most likely still the same man that had belittled him, tormented him, protected him. But, somehow, Harry was beginning to understand something about the man. He’d played over every conversation he remembered having with the man, which, surprisingly, was quite a few. He replayed overheard conversations and remembered details he hadn’t understood at the time. For most of the things the man had done, Harry could excuse or understand, for the rest, well, that was a conversation that would require two people. A conversation that might never happen.

Harry took another deep breath of the warm night air and stepped up to the window. The dummy’s dress looked an odd shade of blue this time of night. Harry stepped through the charmed glass and entered the hospital. He was surprised at the busy waiting room; he stepped around a man with too many ears, and made his way over to the lift. He stepped out onto the familiar floor, and waved at the night nurse before making his way to the familiar door. He stopped outside the room and pressed a hand to the door, taking slow even breaths. He closed his eyes and rested his forehead against the back of his hand.

“Please. Please be awake. Please … just love me,” his broken whisper echoed in his ear. He took a shuddering breath and straightened up. He reached for the door, and pushed it open.

 

__Blue moon!  
Now I'm no longer alone  
Without a dream in my heart  
Without a love of my own

 

Harry froze, blinked, and thought about pinching himself to make sure he was awake. The pale figure on the bed stared mutely at him. Harry reached up to touch the bulge in his pocket and stepped forward.

“You’re awake.”

“It would seem so,” Snape said as he allowed his head to fall back to the pillow. “It would also seem not as much time has passed as I had figured.”

Harry smiled at the unspoken question, and crossed the room. “A year.” Snape’s eyes flicked over to him, and Harry quickly broke the eye contact, remembering the man’s skill with Legilemency. “A year and three months. He’s dead. You’ve been cleared of all charges.” Snape’s hand twitched, and he let out a muted gasp. Harry’s eyes flicked back to black. “In fact,” he reached into his pocket and pulled out the small box, flipped it open, and held it up for Snape to see. “I’ve just come from the ceremony the Ministry threw to honor you.” There was movement, and he looked over to see Snape’s right hand reaching across his body. Harry pulled the large medallion out, and pressed it to the man’s hand. Snape grasped it, and brought it up to his face, his eyes suspiciously bright as his mouth formed the words etched on the coin.

“First class.” His eyes closed. “How?”

Harry gave a soft smile. “You’re a hero, Snape. Whether you want it or not.”

Snape gave a soft sigh, and lowered the medallion as if it were too heavy. Harry made to take it, but Snape’s fingers tightened on it. Harry moved his hand back, and placed the black box on the table. “Why are you alive?”

Harry chuckled at the man’s wince. “I know what you mean. It’s okay, Sir.” Black eyes widened at the honorific, and Harry felt his cheeks blush. “I know. I didn’t do that enough as a student. I apologize. In fact, I’m aware that I owe you several apologies. But, the battle. They call it the Final Battle.”

“Final?” Snape said hoarsely.

“Yes. Final. He’s really gone this time. We got all the…” Harry flinched, “the pieces. He took care of mine when he killed me. Yes, I did die. But I was given the choice to come back. I took it.”

“Of course you did,” Snape huffed.

Harry smiled ironically. “I hadn’t killed him yet. My job wasn’t done.”

Snape turned his head and raised an eyebrow. “And now? Is your job done now?”

Harry turned to glance at the box on the table and let his fingers run over the soft velvet. “He’s dead. I’m… Horcrux free. Wizarding Britain is safe once again.”

“For now,” Snape huffed and Harry nodded in agreement. The next one wouldn’t be his problem.

“You’re free. You’ve been recognized as the hero you are,” Harry ignored the man’s snort. “And you’re awake. So, yeah. My job’s done. How long have you been awake?”

Snape gave an odd little shrug. “You are the first to grace my presence since I regained consciousness.”

Harry gaped at him. “You haven’t seen a Healer yet?”

Snape shook his head. “No. I thought perhaps I had been tucked away and forgotten.”

Harry beamed at the man. “Never, Snape. I wouldn’t let that happen.” He stroked the black box once more, turned from the room, and went to find someone in robes of green.


	3. Green- Emerald, Jade, olive

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this is so late. I've been sick this week and have barely gotten out of bed. But, better late than never :) Also, Happy Thanksgiving to my readers in the U.S.

#  **Green- Emerald, Jade, olive**

[ (Green by Sister Hazel) ](https://youtu.be/aY44wIlCqnM)

 

_Welcome to the world, oh yeah_   
_A very unusual place_   
_Don't let that scare you_   
_Welcome to the world, oh yeah_   
_It's in your face_   
_It's all around you_

 

“I wouldn’t let that happen.” Potter’s words continued to echo in his head as the… young man, yes he could see it now, left to go find a healer. Severus closed his hand around the gold medallion again, still not daring to believe this could all be real. Had he woken in some alternate dimension? Perhaps he truly had gone crazy. The Dark Lord dead and no repercussions for Severus? And if his math held true, Potter was now nineteen, or close to, a legal adult in both worlds for more than a year. No. He pushed the thought from his mind. Potter might have fought to clear his name, and Severus had no doubt he had, but that didn’t mean the man fancied him any more now than he had two years ago. Even if he had wanted to, Severus didn’t have time to dwell on the thoughts. He heard a commotion outside his door, and several green-robed figures came bursting in. They surrounded him, speaking all at once, and waving their wands, casting diagnostic spells, summoning vials, and thrusting odd smelling concoctions in his face. It was too much. He looked around frantically for a familiar face or even someone that looked to have some authority.

 

_Well it can't go on, and on, and on forever_   
_So let it go_   
_And hold on tight_   
_It's all so new, yeah you're so green_   
_But I'll cover you_   
_So enjoy the view, oh you're so green_   
_Until you balance on the earth to find that love surrounds you_

 

“Stop!” It might not have been his schoolroom voice, but it was just as effective. Every person in the room came to a standstill. He glared at the nearest Healer who happened to be a witch he vaguely recalled as a Hufflepuff. She swallowed and blinked owlishly down at him. “Potter!”

“I’m here, Se- sir,” a small voice came from the back of the small crowd. Had the man almost called him “Severus?”  No, it was simply his imagination. The crowd seemed to part as Potter pushed his way to Severus’s side. He glared at the man so as not to give away how relieved he was to see the familiar green eyes. “Take the coin and keep it with you. I’ve no wish to lose something you have worked hard to obtain. Merlin knows I need proof that you can accomplish something.” The man beamed down at him.

“Yes, sir.” Potter reached for the award, his warm fingers brushing over Severus’s. Severus had to keep from clutching at the unfamiliar hand. Green eyes stared down at him, and he watched a pink flush fill tanned cheeks. “I’ll keep it safe for you, Sir.”

Severus nodded, and the coin slipped from his hand. He watched Potter tuck it into the box, and the box went back into his pocket. He glared at the young man. “Now, I wish to sit up; then, I will speak to whomever is in charge here.”

Potter smiled approvingly and stepped back as one of the Healers stepped forward. He was young, no older than Potter. No that wasn’t correct. He was about five years older than Potter, if Severus remembered the Ravenclaw correctly.

“Healer Cranston, Professor. I’m overnight shift lead.”

Severus glared at the man. “Excellent. Then be useful, and help me sit up. Then you will explain a few things.” He was gratified to see the man nod nervously and move forward. Imbecile. If he were truly in charge he would have made one of the medi-witches do it. Once he was settled, he looked around the small group awaiting their next order from him. He smirked internally. “Potter. You look like you’ve just faced down a Dark Lord. Go home and get some sleep.”

“Just the ministry, Sir,” Potter said almost cheerfully. “I’ll return in the morning.”

Severus snorted. “If you must.” He didn’t wait for the door to close behind the boy before he turned to the Healer. “Speak.”

 

_Welcome to the world, oh yeah_   
_It's not your typical space_   
_Just let it hold you_   
_Welcome to the world, oh yeah_   
_Don't quit the race_   
_Let it unfold you_

 

The healer knew very little about Severus’s condition or treatment over the last year. In short, he could answer practically none of Severus’s questions. Severus sent the coterie of Healers from his room until someone could answer his questions intelligently. A silver-haired Healer arrived with his breakfast several hours later. Having a basic knowledge of how things stood and the relief of knowing he was relatively safe had allowed him to relax enough to rest. The new Healer introduced himself, and they spoke at length over the next hour about the potions and healing regimen Severus had been on the last year. Severus did not miss Potter slipping into the room; his green eyes staring intently at Severus. He made the man-no-longer-a-boy fill him in on all that had happened since Nagini’s attack. He listened intently as he stared down at the medallion Potter had brought back with him. When he had finished his questions for the time being, Snape once again sent the coin home with the green-eyed man. The next weeks were filled with tests and spells and more potions. They had returned his wand, but he was told he couldn’t use it until they ascertained the level of dark residue left in his system that might exacerbate the remaining poison. It was the one restriction that did not irritate him to some degree. He was not about to test the limits of Mungo’s healing abilities until he felt ready to fight his own body’s reaction to the venom. And through it all, Potter continued to slip quietly into his room each day.

 

_Well it can't go on, and on, and on forever_   
_So let it go_   
_And hold on tight_   
_It's all so new, yeah you're so green_   
_But I'll cover you_   
_So enjoy the view, oh you're so green_   
_Until you balance on the earth to find that love surrounds you_

 

Severus wasn’t sure how much longer he could take it all. He had had so many visitors since he’d woken up almost a month ago. McGonagall and the other professors coming to apologize. He waved them off, knowing he’d had a part to play, had played them all in this evil game between Dumbledore and Voldemort. Kingsley and other Ministry officials coming to thank him for his part in the war. He ignored them, knowing that, save a very few, the Ministry had done very little in the overall war, choosing instead to hide behind bureaucracy. The younger Malfoy and other ex-students, including a few Gryffindors, coming to acknowledge his efforts in protecting them that last year. He extended his apologies that he had been unable to do more. He read newspaper accounts from the last year, scoffing at some of the blatant attempts at toadying to Potter; innuendos that the man might be the next Head Auror, Head of the entire Department of Magical Law Enforcement, or even Minister. At one time he would have believed it; he knew better now. The articles did, however, bring up some questions and, after an afternoon with Minerva, Severus began to wonder if he could trust Potter’s accounting of the war. The man had, apparently, done so much more than he’d led Severus to believe. During and after the battle.

More Healers came. A specialist from France ran extensive tests before giving the all clear for Severus to use his magic. Another specialist from Russia had Severus on a muggle exercise routine to help him regain the muscle strength even the potions had been unable to help with. A nutrition specialist from Italy laid out a diet plan for Severus to follow once he was released. And ever hovering in the background stood a green-eyed man, warily waiting for Severus to send him home.

 

_Anywhere you go_   
_I'm gonna be one step behind you_   
_You may not know_   
_But I'll be there_   
_Welcome to the human race_   
_It's a very unusual place_   
_But that's what makes it wonderful_

 

“Home.” The word echoed in Severus’s mind. But where was home now? He was no longer Headmaster, he’d abandoned his position, and he wasn’t so sure he wanted to return to the school in any capacity. Besides, Minerva had mentioned just last week, with the extensive repairs to the castle still underway, most classes were being held in old, once-abandoned classrooms, and unused living quarters had been turned into dorms for the two “tower Houses.” There was still his old childhood home, but it had always been a reminder, a form of self-flagellation, for his youthful folly, and he wasn’t sure he wished to return there.

“As much as I would love to release you, Mr. Snape,” the silver-haired Medi-wizard said, “I don’t believe it is safe for you to continue in your recovery without at least the modicum of another individual around to aide you should you become incapacitated. I have reason to believe that, as you begin to use your powers more and more, we could see more manifestations of the poison's effects.”  The man gave him a stern look over the spectacles he’d donned to read Severus’s scroll chart. “I do not believe we are out of the woods quite yet.”

Severus sighed. “Well, I cannot very well stay here, wasting away while we take a wait-and-see approach. I have lost over a year of my life to that damn snake, and I’ve no wish to waste more.”

“If you have any solutions, Mr. Snape, I will be more than happy to take them into consideration. Think on it, and we will discuss it more after your therapy tomorrow.” He turned and left the room, Severus staring after him.

“So, you’re stuck in the hospital unless you can hire a nanny to make sure you don’t fall?”

Severus almost allowed the burst of laughter out before clenching his jaw together. He turned to the green-eyed man pressed into a corner of the room. “You have, as the muggles say, hit the nail on the head, Mr. Potter.”  He watched the man chew on his bottom lip.

“I might have a solution, if you are amenable,” Potter added quickly.

Severus blinked slowly at the man. “At this point, Mr. Potter, I would agree to almost anything, save returning to teaching or joining an organization determined to eradicate half the world’s population and branding the other half, to get out of this wretched place.” He was pleased by Potter’s chuckle.

“Does that include living with me?”

Severus’s heart jumped into his throat, and he fought to catch his breath. “That depends,” he said in his deathly calm voice. “Would I be required to teach you anything?”

A soft blush filled the man’s cheeks. “Er, no, Sir.” His lips lifted in a saucy smile. “And I don’t care much for killing. Or marking people.” Well, it was a pity about that last part, but Severus thought he could handle that for a bit while he recovered. But he didn’t want to seem too eager to accept Potter’s offer.

“And why would I agree to living with you, Potter?”

The man’s cheeks went red again. “Um, well, I live there, so that takes care of the Healers concerns. Plus I have a house elf. And the wards are still up on Grimmauld Place so the reporters wouldn’t be able to hound you. And I’m sure you’d like to get out of this place and rejoin the human race,” Potter added cheekily.

 

_Now your world has just begun_   
_You're a very unusual one_   
_And that's what makes you beautiful_   
_Well it can't go on, and on, and on forever_   
_So let it go_   
_It will go on, and on, and on forever_   
_When you go, so hold on, hold on_

 

Severus eyed the man warily. “What are you hoping to get out if this?”

Potter fidgeted uncomfortably. “I just want to show my appreciation. I owe you a lot and… Well, I don’t want you to think that you have to do this all on your own. I’d… I’d like to offer my friendship.”

Friendship. He thought of the few friends he’d had in his life, and how easily they had turned on him. Lily for James after a badly timed comment in their already rocky friendship. Albus for the chance to further his cause. He narrowed his eyes. “What do you want, Potter?”

The man wrung his hands together, and smiled shyly at Severus. “For you to call me ‘Harry’ and maybe, not- not be such a git,” he added with a blush. “I mean, I get you probably can’t stand Gryffindors, but you won’t have to teach them any more.”

“If I live with you, I will still have to interact with them.”

Potter shrugged. “Yeah. A bit.” The green eyes lit up with excitement. “A compromise. That’s what Slytherins do, yeah?” Severus nodded slowly, wondering what the man was up to. “You can have the Malfoy’s over. Whenever you’d like.”

Severus blinked in surprise. “The Malfoys?”

“Yeah. I mean, I don’t care for Lucius, but we’ve been kinda trying to make amends with Malfoy- er, Draco, you know. So it wouldn’t be too bad.”

“I am not very friendly with Lucius either, Mr. Potter. And I imagine he has very little to say to me after learning of my deceit.” Potter seemed to deflate a bit. “But the younger Malfoy is not as intolerable as his patriarch.” Potter’s countenance seemed to light up, and Severus gave a small nod. “Alright, Mr. Potter. We will see how well we get along as housemates.” Potter’s beaming smile sent a frisson of heat straight to his groin.

 

_Welcome to the world, oh yeah_   
_Welcome to the world, oh yeah_   
_Welcome to the world, oh yeah_

 

They arrived on the steps of Grimmauld Place on a sunny afternoon in the first week of October, and Severus made Potter stop before opening the door. He took in the bright sunlight and fresh air, enjoying them for the first time in so many years. He looked down to see the other man beaming at him, a seemingly constant look on the man’s face since Severus had accepted his “friendship.”

“Feels nice, don’t it? To know you’ll still be able to enjoy it tomorrow.”

Severus gave a nod. “It does indeed, Mr. Potter. It seems the sun has never been a brighter shade of yellow.”


	4. Yellow- Flaxen, butter gold

#  **Yellow- Flaxen, butter gold**

[ (Blue and Yellow by The Used) ](https://youtu.be/EcCUQNsUrv4)

 

_And it's all in how you mix the two_   
_And it starts just where the light exists_   
_It's a feeling that you cannot miss_   
_And it burns a hole_   
_Through everyone that feels it_

 

They easily fell into a routine. Harry had made Kreacher clean out every room to give Snape options, and the man had ended up choosing one of the larger rooms that had a window. After the display on the porch, Harry hadn’t been surprised. He was also secretly thrilled that the room happened to be across the hall from his own. Later, Snape made Harry help him clean out the attic and set up a lab. They had Bill over to check for curses before Snape set up his own wards to protect his brewing area. The eldest Weasley sibling gave him a look when he saw Snape step out of the room across from Harry’s. Harry blushed and stammered something about lunch.

Harry did his best to stay out of Snape’s way, and Snape seemed to be repaying the “favor.” Except at breakfast. Snape always made it a point to arrive just as Harry was sitting down for breakfast. It took Harry a few days to get used to having the man across from him first thing in the morning, hair pulled back, a sleepy look about his eyes as he lazily perused the paper. As they neared the end of their meal, Snape would often casually ask Harry about something or other, and the two men would often spend another hour sipping tea and talking. Sometimes, Harry got the impression that Snape was almost as reluctant to leave the table as he was.

 

_Well you're never gonna find it_   
_If you're looking for it_   
_Won't come your way_   
_Well you'll never find it_   
_If you're looking for it_

 

It hadn’t taken Severus long to figure out how to draw Potter into conversation. He’d actually taken to waking up earlier than usual to meet the man over breakfast. It took him some time before Severus realized Potter did not speak of his relationship with Ginevra. He had known of, and seen, their growing relationship at the end of the man’s sixth year. He had expected that by moving in with Potter, he would probably have to see the more intimate side of the man’s relationships. But he’d been here for almost three weeks, and the man hadn’t even so much as gone out socially other than his weekly lunches at the Burrow. He’d had people over, mainly Granger and Weasley, but a few others as well. Ginevra had been over a time or two, but the two did not act as if they were in any sort of romantic relationship. Severus began to wonder if they were even in any sort of relationship. Was Potter even seeing anyone? He watched Potter closely as he questioned the man about his many friends over breakfast one morning, trying to ascertain where the man stood. Potter gave no indication either way, and Severus was getting frustrated. Until the answer came striding through the Floo.

 

_Should've done something but I've done it enough_   
_By the way your hands were shaking_   
_Rather waste some time with you_

 

Harry was finally starting to relax and enjoy his breakfasts with Snape, though the man still hadn’t taken to calling him “Harry.” Their conversations were easy, friendly. Snape sharing information almost freely, although Harry had intentionally avoided the Marauders and Death Eaters. They had had a long discussion on the topic of the war after one of Draco’s visits with the ex-professor, but Harry felt the man had seriously downplayed his role. Harry let him have it, he knew the man hoarded his privacy as much as he himself did.

They were in the kitchen, finishing up their breakfast and conversation when the Floo flared to life, and a familiar, blonde-haired man in pale yellow robes stepped through. Harry shot a look at Snape to see the man holding his wand under the lip of his breakfast plate. Harry thought he should probably protect the Frenchman from Snape’s hair trigger. Harry stood up, and crossed over to the blonde.

“Alec, what are you doing here?”

Alec beamed at Harry, and wrapped his arms around him for a fierce hug. “‘Arry, it’s been ages, love.” He placed a hard kiss on Harry’s cheek, and Harry felt the blood rush to his face, but refused to look at Snape. Sure, he might have failed to mention that he was gay when he’d invited the man to live with him, but, really, Harry’s sex life (or lack thereof) was none of Snape’s business. “I was down visiteen’ with Bill and Fleur, and of course conversation turned to you. Bill said you ’ad been busy with some project, but I couldn’t leave England without a quick taste, no?” And before Harry could comprehend the man’s words, Alec’s mouth was covering his, and he opened for the probing tongue. Harry moaned, and slid a hand up to run his fingers through the soft hair. Merlin, it had been so long since he’d had a good snog. He’d been so busy rejoicing in Snape’s recovery and then getting the man settled in he- oh, fuck! He pushed back from Alec.

“Alec, stop.” He wiped at the wetness around his mouth.  “I- I can’t do this right now. I told you it wouldn’t work out.”

Alec gave him a soft smile. “I am not asking for anything, My ‘arry. I only needed to see you. Come-”

“I can’t,” Harry said, backing away. He turned to see Snape still sitting at the table, wand still in his hand, but it looked like the man’s hand was shaking. Had he over exerted himself yesterday? Harry knew he’d spent the day brewing.

“Oh, ‘ello,” Alec greeted the man. “Bill did not mention you ‘ad taken a lover, ‘Arry. I do apologize for any misunderstanding.” Alec stepped forward, hand outstretched.

“He’s not-” Harry began but was cut off by Snape’s words as he took the man’s hand.

“Severus Snape.”

“Ze spy?” Alec asked incredulously. He turned a saucy smile on Harry and winked. “You do know how to pick zem, ‘Arry. I will leave you to it, gentlemen.” And Alec stepped back through the Floo.

 

_And you never would have thought in the end_   
_How amazing it feels just to live again_   
_It's a feeling that you cannot miss_   
_It burns a hole through everyone that feels it_

 

Severus wasn’t sure which feeling was more pronounced at the moment. The overwhelming joy that Potter wasn’t in a relationship with Ginevra. The shock that apparently The Boy Who Lived was gay. The anger at the thought that some stranger could so blatantly walk into Potter’s house, and kiss the man senseless. And hadn’t that looked exquisite, to see the man so responsive and give so easily to the dominating kiss? And now lust was clawing its way to the top of the list.

“Well, that explains why Ms. Weasley no longer blatantly throws herself at you.” He loved watching the blush fill the man’s face.

“I suppose I should have mentioned I was gay before inviting you to stay. If it makes you uncomfortable…”

Severus waved his words off. “I don’t see how it is any concern of mine.” He narrowed his eyes at the man. “Unless of course you were planning on finding yourself in my bed. Then I would have quite a bit to say on the matter.” Yes, quite a bit, Severus thought. Mainly along the lines of “Yes” and “fuck” and “oh, Harry.”

Potter shook his head as his cheeks turned red. “No. No, I’d never force myself on someone. Most especially not you, Sir. I have too much respect for you.” Pity, Severus thought.

Severus gave up on brewing after he’d burnt the fifth calming drought due to his mind wandering with thoughts of Potter. He recalled the kiss from earlier and the man’s response. Was he that responsive in bed as well? Severus had known he respected and admired the man but now, the thoughts that filled his head had him lusting after the green-eyed devil as well. The only potion Severus made correctly that day was a personal lubricant he’d perfected years ago. He eyed the soft yellow liquid, and smiled. It would certainly come in handy now, and, hopefully, eventually he could use it on Potter.

 

_Well you're never gonna find it_   
_If you're looking for it_   
_Won't come your way_   
_Well you'll never find it_   
_If you're looking for it_

 

Harry wasn’t sure what to expect now that Snape knew he was gay, so it surprised him when nothing really changed. Snape still showed up for breakfast, they still lingered over tea, talking, he still smiled politely to Harry’s friends as he passed through on his way to the lab, Malfoy still showed up on Wednesdays for their weekly tea. Harry tried to study the man surreptitiously for any sort of sign the man was disgusted with him. But Snape had always been hard to read. Harry was the one with an open mind. There were times Harry could still see the old potions professor, and other times he could see the half-blood Prince. Snape had seemed to mellow to a point, though he still had no qualms about calling Harry an idiot when he felt the need. Harry felt the man was slowly accepting his friendship.

Harry took a commision from Gringott’s and joined Bill for a two week trip to Africa. He thought it might have been a good idea to get away from Snape, for a while anyway. This thought was confirmed when he realized on their third morning in Africa just how acutely he missed the dark-eyed man. He vowed to accept more of the bank’s commissions to destroy dark artifacts that were considered dangerous. Harry had become somewhat knowledgeable on the topic during his time on the run as they’d sought ways to destroy the Horcruxes. They returned to England, and Harry’s heart pounded with the anticipation of seeing Severus again.

 

_Should've done something but I've done it enough_   
_By the way your hands were shaking_   
_Rather waste some time with you_

 

Severus had known he missed Potter; he just hadn’t realized how much until the younger man stepped through the Floo. Severus had just finished a quick tea and was standing at the sink, rinsing his cup when the Floo flared to life. He turned, wand in hand and watched as a familiar figure stumbled through the flames. He slipped his wand into his pocket and watched the man dust himself off. Potter finally looked up and saw him. The beaming smile and bright eyes were a welcome sight. Severus clenched his hand, digging his short nails into his palm to keep himself from darting across the room, and pressing the man against the wall to welcome him home.

“Hey,” Potter said. Severus gave a terse nod.

“Have a successful venture?”

“Yeah. Africa’s kinda hot though.”

“Hmm. I thought you were done saving the world?”

Potter smiled cheekily. “I never said that, Snape. Besides, this is my choice, and I have the right to say no.”

“I suppose there is a difference. Tea?”

Potter glanced at the still-warm pot on the counter. “Sure. Were you just about to have some or...”

Severus thought of his lab upstairs, ingredients set up on the worktable ready to start his next project. “I was.” He grabbed a second cup, and filled them before crossing over to where Potter was settling in behind the table. Severus held the cup out to Potter, and the man took it, their fingers brushing. Severus sat down, and noticed Harry’s hand shaking a little as he sipped the tea. Had he been hit with a curse? Or was he simply over-tired? “Tell me about your trip,” he enquired.

 

_Should've said something but I've said it enough_   
_By the way my words were faded_   
_Rather waste some time with you_

 

Snape joined him for a drink later that evening, and they talked some more. Harry thought he could get used to this, seeing Snape first thing every morning and just before bed each night. As if the man weren’t already on his mind at those times. They talked or didn’t talk, they read or sat staring into the fire. Harry didn’t mind, as long as they just were. Eventually, they touched on topics they had been avoiding. Snape all but demanded to know of Harry’s life before Hogwarts. Harry carefully treaded the waters of Snape’s school years. These conversations were soft-voiced and low, sentences trailing off as they were each lost in their own words. But Harry wouldn’t have had it any other way.

 

_Waste some time with you_   
_Waste some time with you_   
_Waste some time with you_

 

Severus was beginning to realize how much he was coming to rely on these evening sessions with Potter. He missed him on Sundays when he was gone to the Burrow, so much that he’d taken to retiring early. There was a slight difference between Morning Potter and Evening Potter. The man he spoke to over the breakfast table was still slightly half asleep, the man he shared evening drinks with was jovial, the day’s events ready to spill out of him. Potter’s exuberance was a bit overwhelming at times, but Severus merely sat back in his chair, letting Potter’s excitability swirl around him as he sipped his whiskey, the light from the glowing fire turning the walls a dark orange.


	5. Orange - honey, fire, Pumpkin

#  **Orange- honey, fire, Pumpkin**

[ (Orange Colored Sky by Natalie Cole) ](https://youtu.be/cwM4NA0Jq7I)

 

_I was walking along_   
_Mindin' my business_   
_When out of the orange colored sky_   
_Flash! Bam!_   
_Ali-ca-zam!_   
_Wonderful you came by_

 

“I don’t even know if I know how to love someone correctly,” Harry admitted late one evening. It was one of the maudlin nights when they’d been discussing Harry’s childhood. “I mean, I love Ron and Hermione. I’d die for them.” He gave an ironic smile at Snape’s snort.

“No offense, Potter, but you died for the entire Wizarding world.”

Harry felt his cheeks heat up. “Alright, then. I’d kill for them.”

Snape gave a nod. “Now, that is a sentiment I can believe. And why does this make you think you do not know how to love correctly?”

Harry took a sip of his whiskey and shrugged. “Well, that’s just friendship, innit? Friendship is easy compared to romantic love. I thought I was in love with Gin, then I realized I was gay. I suppose we could have made a decent go at it, but I don’t think I would have ever loved her properly.”

“And you think you can love a man properly?”

Harry shrugged and stared into the fire. “What if I don’t know what love is?”

“I thought love was your great superpower, Potter?” Harry watched Snape’s throat work as he took a sip.

“The capacity for love, Snape. Did you know, the night I met Sirius I believed him to be my parents’ killer, and three hours later I was ready to move in with the man.” He snorted. “Pathetic. I was so starved for love, so desperate to belong.” Harry stared into the glowing fire, watching the logs pop and shoot orange sparks into the air.

“I believe I can understand the sentiment, Mr. Potter,” Snape said slowly. Harry turned to look at the man studying the fire intently.

“Is that why you never got over my mum?”

Black hair whipped around the sallow face as Snape turned sharply to face Harry. “Got over? One does not simply _get over_ losing a friend, Potter. Lily Evans was the best friend I ever had.”

Harry blinked at the man. “Friend? But I thought… I mean, your Patronus.”

“Built on years of childhood memories. The only happy times in my miserable existence, and yes, they happened to include your mother. But I was no more _in love_ with her than you are Ms. Granger.”

Harry blinked at the man for several long seconds before turning back to stare into the orange flames. “So, then, have you ever been in love?”

He saw Snape lift the glass to his lips out of the corner of his eye. “If you mean romantic love my answer would probably have to be no. I do not know if I am capable of such. Or, perhaps, like you, I have merely been unable to find the right man.”

Harry froze. _Man?_   Snape was gay? He had to bite back the smile that threatened to spread across his face.

 

_I was hummin' a tune_   
_Drinkin' in sunshine_   
_When out of that orange colored view_   
_Wham! Bam!_   
_Ali-ca-zam!_   
_I gotta look at you_

 

“So, you’re gay,” Harry said when he felt he could safely face the man without breaking out into whoops of glee.

Snape nodded. “I am. Your mother knew, though she was the only one other than the few muggle lovers I had over the years.”

Harry felt a pang of jealousy but squashed it down. What could he expect? Snape was twenty years older than him. He couldn’t very well expect the man to be a virgin. “I suppose it was too dangerous to be with a wizard.” He took a large gulp of his firewhiskey.

Snape nodded. “It was. I needed Dumbledore to believe my love for Lily was such as you had assumed. I needed nothing else for him to hold over my head. The Dark Lord did not look kindly to those of our persuasion.”

Harry blinked at him. “Why are you telling me then?”

Snape took a sip of his drink and eyed Harry. “The war is over. I have no reason to hide anymore. You yourself assured me the Dark Lord was gone.”

“But, why _me_?” Harry questioned again.

Snape gave a small half shrug. “I felt you had the right to know. I read of your defense of me, Potter. I know it was based on what you perceived as my love for your mother. And, while you may have been correct to a certain extent, I felt you deserved to know the whole truth.”

Harry blinked at the man and chewed on his bottom lip thoughtfully. “Um, thanks.”

Snape gave a nod and stood, placing his drink on the sideboard before striding from the room. Harry listened carefully for the sound of the man’s door closing upstairs before allowing the grin to spread across his face. “Hah!” He slapped a hand over his mouth and glanced guiltily at the doorway. Snape was gay. Snape hadn’t been in love with his mother. He might actually have a chance.

 

_One look and I yelled "timber"_   
_Watch out for flying glass_   
_'Cause the ceiling fell in_   
_And the bottom fell out_   
_I went into a spin_   
_And I started to shout,_   
_"I've been hit, this is it, this is it."_

 

Harry tried not to be too over enthusiastic when next he saw Severus. He smiled softly at the other man over the breakfast table the next morning and eagerly stayed to talk. He wished he wasn’t expected at the Burrow, but he was determined not to give himself away. He knew he was grinning like an idiot, his mind a whirl with the things he had learned the previous night. He could barely focus on what Severus was saying, thankful the man was talking about his latest project and didn’t actually expect Harry to understand the nuances of what he was saying. Harry watched the thin lips form words and curl into a smirk. Harry knew the man had most likely just said something he knew would go over Harry’s head, and Harry couldn’t help the small blush. He mumbled incoherently and forced his eyes down to his tea. Snape’s warm chuckle made Harry’s stomach drop. In a way, he was almost thankful when it was time to go to the Burrow.

As soon as Harry arrived, Hermione gave him an assessing look, and dragged him to a quiet spot.

“What’s going on? I haven’t seen you this happy since the day Snape woke up.”

Harry bit at his lip and beamed at her. “He _wasn’t_ in love with my mum, ‘Mione. They were only friends.”

She eyed him skeptically. “Okay,” she said slowly.

“And he’s gay,” Harry blurted out breathlessly.

Hermione sighed. “Harry-”

He waved his hand at her. “No. I know. It doesn’t mean anything. But it might. I mean, he’s already accepted my friendship. What’s to say there won’t be more in the future?”

She studied him for several long seconds. “Harry, I just don’t want you to get hurt.”

He gave her a reassuring smile. “I know, ‘Mione. But after all this time, you can’t expect me to not even _consider_ it.”

“I know you think you love him-”

“I do love him, Hermione.” Her lips pursed, and he crossed his arms over his chest. “Okay. So yeah, I fell in love with him while he was in a coma, but since he’s woken up, I’ve really gotten to know him. And not just through other people’s memories.” Harry unlocked his arms and brought a fist to his chest. “This is real, Hermione. I _know_ Severus now. We’ve talked and lived together for months now. I know what he’s like in the mornings when he wakes up. I know how grumpy he can get when an experiment isn’t working out just right. I know how maudlin he becomes when he allows himself to wallow in the past. I’ve made him laugh. He’s made _me_ laugh. This isn’t the Half-Blood Prince or some fantasy hero I’ve conjured, Hermione. This is Snape. And I love him,” he added softly.

Hermione studied him and let out a soft sigh. “So this is for real? This is it?”

Harry nodded, a soft smile forming on his lips. “Yeah. This is it.”

 

_I was walking along_   
_Mindin' my business_   
_When love came and hit me in the eye_   
_Flash! Bam!_   
_Ali-ca-zam!_   
_Out of the orange colored sky_

 

Harry did his best to maintain the previously established status quo as he tried to determine if he might be able to move their relationship past mere friendship. Harry had to admit to himself that it might take some time since Severus was such a private person who was not overly fond of emotionalism. It still didn’t stop Harry’s head from spinning when the man was near. Didn’t stop the desire to reach out and simply touch the man any time he was close enough. Harry was careful not to be overly tactile with Severus, no more than he was with Ron or Hermione. He didn’t want to scare Severus away or make him feel uncomfortable.

He loved his mornings with Severus, watching the man wake up and start each day. Discussing little things over breakfast as Harry attempted to jump start his own brain with tea and bacon. Evenings were better as there was no time limit. Work was done for the day and potions were brewed. The only thing left was to sit and talk by the fire until either or both were unable to keep their eyes open. Harry couldn’t stop the smiles that broke out across his face as he sat there listening to Severus each evening. He wanted to be a Gryffindor and simply cross the room and slip into Severus’s lap, but he cherished the man too much to do something stupid that might cost him Severus’s friendship.

So he was cautious, calling on every bit of Slytherin self-preservation to keep his emotions in check. Harry was biding his time, hoping Severus would stay around long enough to form at least a deep enough friendship to allow Harry to stay a part of his life even after he moved out. But it still hurt when Severus mentioned going to his old muggle house to see if it was habitable. Harry prayed it wasn’t.

 

_Well, one look and I yelled "timber"_   
_Watch out for flying glass_   
_'Cause the ceiling fell in_   
_And the bottom fell out_   
_I went into a spin_   
_And I started to shout,_   
_"I've been hit, this is it, this is it."_

 

The house was almost familiar from the memories Harry had spent so much time thinking of. He waited patiently as Severus pressed his palm to the door and let it swing open, creaking ominously. Both men readied their wands as they stepped cautiously inside. Several Revealing spells turned up nothing as they moved through the dusty old house. Harry didn’t think the house could be called livable in its current condition and wasn’t sure it could actually be _made_ livable. Even with magic. A small part of him thrilled at the thought that Severus had no place to go. Keeping his happiness in check, Harry gave a small cough.

“Well, I’m definitely glad I didn’t send you to live on your own here.” Harry looked warily around. “I think you’re going to have to consider other options, Snape.”

Severus glanced around in resignation and nodded. “I do believe you are right, Potter.”

“You can stay with me as long as you need, Snape,” Harry said, trying to sound nonchalant and not as if he were secretly crossing his fingers.

Severus’s eyes roamed over the cracked ceiling of the kitchen, spots of mold clearly evident on the white plaster. His thin lips turned down in a frown. “I suppose I will have to continue taking advantage of your generosity for the time being, Potter.”

Harry bit his lip to keep from crying out in joy. Instead, he let his eyes drift around the dingy room. “We should probably take anything salvageable with us,” he suggested.

“A sensible idea, Potter.” Severus glanced over his shoulder, his lip twitching as he met green eyes. “I was unaware you were capable of such a thing.”

This time, Harry let the smile out. “Git. Did you bring a box or anything to put things in?”

Severus shook his head. “I can transfigure the table in the sitting room into a box for the books, and there’s a wardrobe upstairs I would like to keep. It will hold what I need from up there, and I can shrink it.”

They headed back into the sitting room, and Severus waved his wand at the small brown coffee table in front of a ragged, mouse-eaten, couch. A large box now sat in its place.

“I assume you would like all the books packed up?” Severus glanced over at Harry and nodded. “I can do that while you take care of upstairs.”

Severus gave another nod. “Another sensible idea. Have you been saving up?”

Harry chuckled. “Be careful up there, Snape.”

“And do be careful with my books, Mr. Potter. Some are more valuable than your life.”

Harry gave him a cheeky smile. “Only some, Sir?”

Severus gave a snort as he waved his wand at the hidden staircase and waited for the steps to be revealed. Harry watched him step carefully up the steps then began levitating the books carefully into the Transfigured box. He winced at the sound of creaking over his head as Severus moved around upstairs, occasionally glancing up at the ceiling and hoping it didn’t crash in. Harry gave a small sigh of relief when the last book landed in the box. He levitated the filled box over by the door, leaving the shrinking part to Severus. He slipped his wand into the back pocket of his jeans and headed over to the stairs. He glanced warily at the wooden steps and gave a small shrug. If Severus could do it so could he. He pressed one hand against the wall and took a tentative step. When the first step held firmly, he continued up, testing each step before balancing his full weight on each one.

He found Severus in a room at the front of the house adding a pile of books to a beautifully ornate wardrobe. Severus turned at his entrance, but he said nothing and turned back to lock the wardrobe up.

“It’s very beautiful,” he told Severus.

Severus reached a hand up and let his fingers trace over a carving on the door. “It was my mother’s. The only thing her parents allowed her to take when she married my father.”

Harry wasn’t sure what to say to that, so he said nothing as Severus waved his wand, and the wardrobe shrank. Severus summoned the miniature piece of furniture and stepped over to Harry.

“Finished with the books?”

Harry nodded as he slipped the wardrobe from Severus’s fingers and studied it. “Yes. I thought I’d let you shrink it though. I wasn’t sure how delicate the books were.”

Severus took the wardrobe back and slipped it into his pocket. “I do appreciate the tho-”

Suddenly the boards beneath their feet gave an ominous creak, and Harry barely had time to reach out for Severus before they were falling. Harry held the man against him, taking the brunt of the force as they landed on the dusty couch. The breath was knocked from Harry, and he automatically buried his face in the dark robes pressed against him to keep from inhaling the cloud of dust. Harry’s heart sped up as he realized Severus was on top of him, his lean body pressing Harry into the couch, their legs tangled together. Warm breath brushed against Harry’s neck, and he realized Severus had copied Harry’s own actions of covering his mouth and nose with the closest option available. Harry let out a soft moan that had nothing to do with the aches from the impact.

“Are you okay?” Severus’s soft whisper sent a shiver down Harry’s spine, and he turned his head to meet dark eyes.

So close. Severus was so close to him. His lips a hair’s breadth from Harry’s. It would take nothing for Harry to tip his head and meet the thin pink lines. Harry’s fingers wrapped around the strong arms in his grip, and his mouth was suddenly dry. Something glittered in the dark eyes that studied him, and Harry licked his dry lips. Harry shifted beneath the warm body, and Severus’s dark eyes widened. A second later, cool air washed over Harry along with disappointment as Severus quickly stood, pushing himself off the couch and Harry.

He held a hand out, and Harry took it, allowing the man to pull him up. “I apologize, Potter. Are you unhurt?”

Harry straightened his shirt to distract himself from his pounding heart, concentrating on dusting himself off so Severus wouldn’t see the hurt in his eyes. “I’m fine, Snape. Just a bit winded. I’ve had worse,” he said, finally smiling up at the man. Severus snorted.

 

_I was walkin' along_   
_Mindin' my business_   
_When love came and hit me in the eye_   
_Flash! Bam!_   
_Ali-ca-zam!_   
_Out of that orange colored purple striped pretty green polka-dot sky_   
_Flash! Bam!_   
_Ali-ca-zam!_   
_And goodbye !_

 

Fear coursed through Harry as Severus seemed to pull away over the next few weeks. Had his desire shown so easily, scaring Severus away? Had Severus seen what Harry had been trying to hide? The guilt that he had unintentionally ruined their friendship ate at Harry. He tried to act as if things hadn’t changed, but he could still feel the distance Severus kept between them. It ate at Harry. Even their cozy evenings began to fill with tension. It was no surprise to Harry when Severus finally approached him almost a month later to inform him that he had found a nice little shop in Diagon Alley with a flat over it.

Harry didn’t want Severus to leave, but it wasn’t his choice. So he kept his mouth closed and bit his tongue as Severus packed his things. He smiled falsely as Severus thanked him for a place to stay and tried not to sound like he was begging when he asked Severus for tea the following Saturday. Severus gave a terse nod, and Harry clenched his jaw tightly as Severus wrapped his cloak around him and stepped into the cool afternoon.

Harry turned from the cold goodbye and somehow made his way upstairs. He numbly stripped his jeans from his quaking body and set his glasses on the bedside table. The soft sheets barely registered against his skin as he slid between them. The tears filled his eyes, blurring the room into a blob of red.


	6. Red- Scarlet, crimson, ruby

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I'm so late with this one. Been having internet issues with my home computer. Unfortunately, for some reason, the computer I'm using to post this chapter doesn't read my video link so I'll have to edit that part when I get my internet working (hopefully tonight or tomorrow). Until then, I hope you guys enjoy this. Also, heads up, I've gained like 50 followers on Tumblr the last month, so to celebrate, I wrote you guys a Christmas Snarry that I'll post Christmas Eve. As always, thanks to all my lovely readers... Got working link there now :)

#  **Red- Scarlet, crimson, ruby**

[ (Red by Cold Kingdom) ](https://youtu.be/-U8SIMfQmnw)

 

_Rest in the disguise  
_ _And your hunger burns me up inside_  
_I love you_

 

Severus refused to admit he was hiding. He simply needed to concentrate on getting his business going. His time was spent setting up his storefront and getting ready to open. He had potions to brew, an owl order business to set up, and… other things that were required of a new store owner. It didn’t matter that he was almost an instant success before he’d even opened his doors. People were already stopping him on the streets asking when he would open: ex-students remembering his well-brewed concoctions, and others wishing to patronize the shop of a war hero. He wasn’t hiding; he was busy.

The fact that he had owled Potter three weeks in a row to avo- reschedule tea had nothing to do with the memory of the feel of the man beneath him. He did not harbor delusions that the man’s ragged breathing had been any more than Potter trying to get his breath back after the fall through the floor. The pounding heart, scarlet-flushed face, and dilated pupils had only been a result of the no-doubt rush of adrenalin at the sudden fall. It did not mean that Potter wanted him, desired him. The look in Potter’s emerald eyes had not been the heat of lust, and Severus refused to think it had been. He refused to get lost in daydreams of what might never be.

No, he wasn’t hiding from Potter, or the night.

 

_Lead me to the dark  
_ _Into the woods  
_ _Be safely who you are_  
_Follow you_

 

Because the nights were the worst, and sometimes he could not stop himself from closing his eyes and pondering the dreams that haunted him. Waking with sheets twisted around his legs; his body burning with un-remembered touches, pounding heart, sticky thighs, and the memory of Potter beneath him. He remembered the smaller body pressed against him, those green eyes looking up at him. Severus remembered the smell of Potter as he had buried his nose against the salty skin. He had fought the urge to slip his tongue between his lips, and taste the warm skin. It was a miracle Potter hadn’t felt his growing erection.

He’d had to move fast. Pull himself away from Potter before his traitorous body led him down a path of no return. He’d known then he had to walk away from Potter. The man deserved better than a scarred, old, ex-Death Eater; and no matter Severus’s own feelings, he couldn’t allow Potter to become entangled with him. It hurt. It hurt to walk away and see the pain in Potter’s green eyes. It hurt to make a promise to attend tea, knowing he wouldn’t be there. But it was for Potter. For Harry. Because the man deserved to live his life the way he wanted. Harry deserved to be free.

 

_Leading me on I stand by you  
_ _Leaving behind this world waiting for you_  
_I know it's wrong but I care for you_

 

But it was hard. Hard to watch the owl fly in each week and deliver its missive. Hard to write those words that denied him the pleasure of Harry’s company. Hard to not remember the hopeful look in those green eyes as he’d asked for that first tea time. Hard not to give in and see the man that filled his heart. But he knew it was for the best that he left Harry behind. He could never be a part of Harry’s world. Harry was a quintessential Gryffindor. Severus was a Slytherin, an ex-Death Eater. It didn’t matter that others saw him as a hero; he knew deep inside he was no hero. Heroes didn’t fall in love with seventeen year olds that they were sworn to protect. Heroes didn’t lead a man to his death. Heroes didn’t… Heroes weren’t… Severus Snape was not a hero, despite what Harry Potter and the masses thought.

So he brewed, and sold potions, and tried not to think of Potter and how disappointed he must be. Didn’t think about how this potion perfectly matched the soft blush of Potter’s cheeks, or how that salve was the same shade of ruby red as upturned lips in mid laughter. Potter was young. He would move on, forget about his nasty old potions professor. Never know about Severus’s dreams, or how much he wanted the man, craved him. Cared for him.

 

_Calm and paralyzed  
_ _Without a touch linger and  
_ _Hypnotize me_  
_Push harder_

 

Until the day Severus saw Potter standing outside Flourish and Blott’s.

Severus had been coming from Knockturn Alley, having just purchased several vials of Acromantula venom, when he saw the man standing outside the bookshop. Severus paused in the shadows and watched the familiar figure standing there. Sunlight played over the figure, highlighting dark hair, glinting off brass buttons and polished Dragonhide. Harry’s dark hair blowing wildly in the soft breeze, his crimson Auror robes fluttering around him as if he were still on his broom. Potter turned slightly, and even from this distance Severus could see the dark circles under his eyes, the pallor of the soft cheeks. A Weasley joined Potter and not even that brought much more than a vague half-smile to the tight lips.

Severus’s heart caught. He clenched his fists to fight the urge to stride across the narrow street and pull Potter against him, claim those plump pink lips, and once again inhale the salty scent of Harry. His body thrummed with desire, but even more, his heart clenched with need and loneliness. He watched, hypnotized, as Potter and the Weasley headed down the street towards Severus. Severus’s heart pounded with every step that brought Harry closer to him. He could reach out and wrap his fingers around the strong arm and just-

Harry was only a store away from him when Severus Apparated to his flat above the shop.

 

_Wish you trapped me in  
_ _The water's losing  
_ _I cannot dive in to_  
_Go faster_

 

Severus somehow found his way to the chair in front of his fireplace and dropped onto the burgundy cushions. He lowered his head into his hands and braced his elbows on his knees, hunching over as the fire warmed his back. He hadn’t realized how much he had truly missed Harry, and he was drowning in the sudden heartache that washed over him. Seeing Harry had broken a dam somewhere deep inside him, and Severus was slipping under the waves of regret and longing.

He had nearly succeeded in forgetting the soft half-asleep look over morning tea as Harry slowly faced the day. Had refused to remember the glinting orange and red flames reflected in round glasses. The way Harry always looked invigorated after an afternoon spent at the Burrow spending time with his family and enjoying a pickup game of Quidditch. Or how calm and happy he looked sitting in front of the fire as they talked quietly over firewhiskey. Soft smiles. Gentle touches. Effortless considerations in simple things like having Severus’s favorite tea on hand or knowing Severus’s favorite dessert.

It all came back to him now, and he longed to go back and reach out to stroke the soft cheek. Wanted to slide his fingers through the messy hair. Wanted to press himself against the lithe body and feel the pounding heart and ragged breath against his chest again. But more than that, he want to hear Harry’s voice. Hear his laughter, see his smile, watch his emerald green eyes twinkle with joy. Because Severus might be a hero, and he might be a successful potioneer, but his life was an empty shell without Harry’s friendship.

 

_Leading me on I stand by you  
_ _Leaving behind this world waiting for you_  
_I know it's wrong but I care for you_

 

Severus nervously approached the familiar house and knocked on the door. It was almost immediately pulled open to reveal a beaming Potter.

“You came.”

Severus nodded. “I apologize for waiting so long. I have been busy.”

Potter waved the excuse aside and led Severus to the sitting room and waiting tea. “I understand. I’m actually glad you owled. I was starting to feel like a nuisance.” Potter smiled over his shoulder, and Severus’s heart thumped in his chest. He pasted a smirk on his face.

“I wasn’t aware that stopped you, Potter.” Harry chuckled and motioned for Severus to have a seat.

The first tea was a bit tense. The second tea was easier, the third even easier. Soon they fell into a new routine, and Severus didn’t care. He didn’t care that he was tossing aside his carefully crafted Harry-free world. Didn’t care that he was no longer safely ensconced behind a cauldron. Because Harry was smiling, and his green eyes were twinkling and focused on Severus. And Severus was right where he wanted to be. By Harry’s side.

 

_Run faster, stronger  
_ _The path is longer,_  
Longer than ever

 

But he forgot that Harry wasn’t his. Forgot that Harry shouldn’t be saddled with a man like Severus. A fact he was brutally reminded of at another Ministry function when Harry showed up with an elegant brunette on his arms. Severus wanted to storm across the room and pull Harry from the smiling idiot’s arms. He wanted to pull Harry close and claim him there in front of the Minister, the Weasleys, and the Daily Prophet. But Harry seemed so very far away in that moment as Severus watched him from across the room. He turned to speak to Draco and tried to block out the memory of Harry and the other man.

Which is why it surprised him when he felt a slight touch at his elbow. He turned, not sure who to expect. The forming sneer dropped at the sight of Harry in his formal wine red robes. He swallowed thickly at the bright smile and barely realized he had agreed to a dance before he was moving towards the dance floor. Not that he would exchange the feel of Harry in his arms for anything. Time seemed endless as they swept around the dance floor, Harry’s green eyes smiling up at him even as they said next to nothing.

They ended up near the edge of the dance floor, and Harry pulled him behind a pillar after a frantic glance at an approaching Ministry personnel.

“Your date will miss you,” Severus said almost breathlessly as he inhaled the softly musky scent of Harry’s cologne.

Harry glanced up at Severus from the confused Ministry lackey still looking for them. “Oh,” he said, sounding almost breathless as well. “Um, Chris isn’t really my date.” Harry licked his delectable lips, and Severus’s eyes followed the pink tongue. “He’s a friend of Hermione’s who was available at the last minute. I’ve brought him a few times because he’s easy to talk to, and he’s a decent dancer. I-”

But Severus had been unable to watch those soft lips form words any longer without a taste. And, Merlin, did they taste divine. Severus moved his mouth over Harry’s, tasting the cheap champagne always available at these functions. He lapped at the soft lips until they parted, and he swept his tongue into the warm mouth. His blood was rushing in his ears, and he barely registered the soft moan. Reality crashed down around Severus, and he jerked back. Green eyes fluttered open, and Severus felt his own go wide at the realization of what he’d done.

“Severus?” Harry’s soft question sent waves of guilt crashing over Severus. He backed up, and, cursing the Ministry for its Anti-Apparition wards, flew out a side door to the dark gardens outside.

 

_Run faster, stronger  
_ _It's longer than ever_

 

Severus paced in the darkness of the garden. How could he have been so stupid? He couldn’t believe he had actually kissed Harry. His fingers went to his still tender lips, as if he could still feel Harry’s lips against his. His breath caught in his chest at the fresh memory. His heart pounded. Had he lost Harry’s friendship? Ruined the only good thing he had in his life? How could he have been so stupid? To get caught up in what was probably only an obligatory dance. Should he apologize to Harry? Act like nothing had happened? What is one to do in a situation like this? Would he still be expected for tea the following afternoon? Perhaps it would be best to owl his regrets and wait a few weeks to let the awkwardness pass. He could simply explain to Harry he had been caught up in the moment. It had been years since he’d had any sort of release. Yes. Sexual frustration. He would blame it on sexual frustration and apologize for being the idiot he always accused Harry of being.

He looked up at the sound of pounding feet and froze at the sight of a flustered Harry rounding the tall hedge. Harry stopped, and his eyes widened as if he hadn’t actually expected to find Severus there. Harry studied him for a moment before slowly moving forward, approaching Severus as if he were a wild animal, and Harry was afraid he might run. Again. Severus’s breath became shallow as Harry moved closer, as close as they’d been behind the pillar. Harry’s hand moved up, and Severus wondered if Harry was going to strangle him. Instead the warm hand slid around Severus’s neck, and a slow smile spread over Harry’s lips.

“Idiot,” he whispered before pulling Severus’s head down and bringing their lips together once more.

 

_Lead me to the dark  
_ _This hungers burns_

 

Severus’s fingers were sliding through silken strands, his other arm was wrapped around the slender waist, holding Harry tightly against him. Every inch burned with the need to touch Harry. He curled his fingers in the soft hair and gently pulled Harry’s head back, moving his mouth along the strong jawline to taste the salty skin of Harry’s neck.

“Severus.” The whispered word sent a bolt of lust straight to Severus’s cock, and Harry’s fingers tightened their grip on Severus’s own black strands. Harry moaned again and pressed against Severus. “Oh god, Severus.”

Severus pulled back, panting, to look into the dark green eyes. His dark eyes searched the flushed face, and Harry’s eyes fluttered open. The kiss swollen lips curved into a wide smile. Severus’s eyes searched the green depths. “Harry?”

“I-” Harry licked his lips. “I like you, Severus,” Harry said softly. “I really, _really_ like you. I have for a long time, and if you only want a one-off, I don’t think I can handle that. I’ve tried very hard not to push you into something you didn’t want, so if I’m pushing-”

Severus wrapped his arm tighter around Harry and pulled him deeper into the shadows. He pressed Harry against the garden wall and leaned into him. Severus lowered his mouth to Harry’s ear. “I can find a one-off anywhere, Harry. I have desired you for months and have tried not to push you as well. I’ve no wish to trap you with an old ex-Death Eater, but this… this is for as long as you will allow it.”

Harry’s arms wrapped around Severus’s neck, and Severus braced his hands on either side of Harry’s head. “I’m tenacious, Severus,” Harry said with a soft smile. “I have a tendency to collect people and hold on tight.”

Severus let his eyes roam over Harry. “Do you wish to collect me, Harry?”

Harry pressed his body against Severus. “More than anything, Severus. I burn for your touch.”

 

_Leading me on I stand by you  
_ _Leaving this world waiting for you  
_ _I know it's wrong but I  
_ _I know it's wrong but I_  
_I know it's wrong but I care for you_

 

Severus’s breath caught in his chest. “I shouldn’t allow this. I should push you away and make you find someone more worthy of you. I’m old enough to be your father. I’m an ex-Death Eater. People will send Howlers. They’ll-”

“Severus,” Harry cut him off. “Have I ever really cared about what other people thought? My friends already know how I feel about you, and they accept it. All I really care about is you and what you think. I know you have reservations, but please, Severus, give us a chance. I-” Harry cut his words off. A determined look crossed his face, and he glared at Severus defiantly. “I love you.”

Severus’s heart caught in his chest, and he struggled to catch his breath. “I love you, too, Harry.”

Harry’s face broke into a wide grin, and he pressed a hard kiss to Severus’s lips. “Then stop running, Severus. Stop running and come home. Take me to bed and let me show you how much I love you and want you.

Severus chuckled, and shook his head. “You are incorrigible.” He lowered his mouth to press a long, lingering kiss to Harry’s lips. He pulled back to meet green eyes.

“Home?” Harry asked hopefully, green eyes shining with desire. Severus nodded and wrapped a hand around Harry’s waist to indicate he was ready and soon felt the familiar pull of Apparition as everything went black.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is not the end, unless you don't want to read smut. The final chapter is nothing but smut (but I wouldn't be me if I didn't have a little in there somewhere) so you won't miss anything if you stop reading. That's the only warning you'll get :)


	7. Black - Ebony, sable, inky

#  **Black - Ebony, sable, inky**

[ (Black by Dierks Bently) ](https://youtu.be/SPoJJ7D4knk)

  


_The moon outside, too bright, those blinds, yeah let's just keep them closed,_

_You know, my hands they know where to go, to find your fingertips,_

_Trace them back to your lips, take you on a trip, flip that switch_

 

Harry’s hand fell against the window, the fabric of the curtain sliding through his fingers. He curled his fingers tight around the long fingers that slid through his, clasping their hands together. His other hand reached up to slide up the slender form pressing him against the wall. His lover’s mouth pressed against his, strong, sure tongue sliding between his swollen lips. His eyes fluttered, struggling to stay open as Severus assaulted his mouth. The thin lips moved from his own and slid over Harry’s skin, licking, burning a path down to his throat. Harry moaned and tilted his head to give Severus better access. Severus’s tongue tasted and teased him.  Harry pulled his pinned hand from Severus’s fingers to slide his own through the soft waves of Severus’s hair. Harry moaned as he felt deft fingers work the buttons of his robe and shirt loose; he dropped his hands and let the fabric slide to the floor. Severus moved down his body, mouth teasing as he sucked a path over Harry’s collarbone, down his chest and paused at Harry’s pert nipple. Harry let out a gasp as Severus pulled it between his teeth, working the hard nub of desire gently with his teeth. His fingers found their way to Severus’s hair and clutched at the soft strands. His hips arched at the feel of Severus’s fingers working Harry’s trousers down over his hips. Severus dropped to his knees, and Harry’s eyes finally fluttered closed as Severus pushed Harry’s trousers and boots off.

 

_Make my world go black, hit me like a heart attack, knock me flat on my back, yeah_

_Just keep doing that, that thing you're doing there, brush me with your hair, I swear_

_I don't know how long that I can last,_

_Make my world go black, black, make my world black, black_

 

Severus pressed his mouth to the toned muscles of Harry’s stomach, loving the feel of their rippling movement as he pressed his tongue against the warm skin. He circled Harry’s navel with his tongue, dipping the tip into the small hole. Harry jerked, causing his hard cock to brush against Severus’s throat. The man above him moaned, and Severus wrapped his fingers around the slender waist to keep the man from bucking again. He slid his mouth down, Harry’s fingers tightening in his hair, and he neared the leaking organ. He kissed his way down Harry’s groin area, the coarse curls tickling at his nose, lips, and cheeks as he slowly worked his way down to his prize. Finally, he flicked his tongue out to tease the base of Harry’s cock, and the man let out a delicious moan, a throaty, deeper echo of the teasing moans from the garden. Severus pressed his tongue to the underside of Harry’s cock, and let it slide up the man’s length. Harry cried out, and Severus circled the leaking head with his tongue before closing his mouth around the tip. Harry’s hand clenched in his hair as he cried out Severus’s name. Severus slowly slid down his length, taking Harry in inch by inch, swallowing around the hot flesh. He held Harry’s hips tightly against the wall knowing there would be black and blue marks later. He vowed to kiss each one. He sucked on the turgid flesh until Harry was writhing and screaming above him, reveling in the feel of Harry filling his mouth, just as he would soon be filling Harry. He let his tongue play over the hard length for several minutes before pulling back to smile up at Harry.

 

_Like your dress on the floor, yeah the one you don't need anymore,_

_Black like a sky with no stars, just find me and fall into my arms_

 

The second black eyes met green, Harry clenched his fist in Severus’s hair and pulled. The man rose easily to his feet, and Harry crashed their mouths together. He thrust his tongue forcefully into Severus’s mouth and kissed him hard. Harry pressed his body against Severus’s and moved forward. Severus’s hand slid around Harry’s waist, and he stepped back, allowing Harry to lead the way. Harry maneuvered their way through the large sitting room, holding Severus’s attention with kisses and roving hands as they stepped through the door that led to Harry’s bedroom. He guided Severus through the darkened room unerringly to his bed. He stopped and reached up to undo the buttons of Severus’s robe until he was able to slide the fabric from the man’s shoulders. The fabric slid to the floor, but Harry ignored it as he pulled the black undershirt over the man’s head, and tossed it to the floor as well. It was his turn to assault Severus’s neck and nipples as he worked the man’s trousers down. Severus groaned out an order, and Harry obeyed, lowering himself to the bed, and pulling the man down on top of him. His breath caught at the feel of Severus pressing him into the mattress, reminding him of that day on the couch, only so much better as their skin slid over each other. Severus’s mouth once again covered his, and the man’s hair brushed against Harry’s cheek and shoulder. Harry loved the feel of Severus’s hand sliding down his chest, his stomach, over his hip. He moaned, and arched into the touch. Severus shifted on the bed, their naked bodies rubbing together to cause a delicious friction. Harry let his legs fall open as Severus’s knee moved between his thighs, elegant fingers slid between his legs, and an oil-slicked finger pressed against him. Harry arched up into the touch and looked up into ebony eyes.

 

_Make my world go black, hit me like a heart attack, knock me flat on my back, yeah_

_Just keep doing that, that thing you're doing there, brush me with your hair, I swear_

_I don't know how long that I can last,_

_Make my world go black, black, make my world black, black_

 

Severus couldn’t tear his eyes from the verdant ones beneath him. Harry panted as Severus filled him with finger after finger, stretching him, playing with him, teasing him. Harry’s pleasure was so easy to read, even in this darkened room, where the only light was from the embers of the dying fire. Severus’s heart swelled with the knowledge that he was bringing such pleasure to Harry. He found that small nub of nerves, and was rewarded by Harry’s soft gasp; he didn’t think he would ever tire of hearing his name fall from those sweet lips. He bent his head to suck and lave at Harry’s neck, eliciting more sounds of pleasure that drove him forward. His breath caught at Harry’s whispered words of love, and he drove forward, preparing Harry until the man was clutching at him, fingers digging into his pale skin, begging for more. Severus slid his hand from between Harry’s legs, and moved to cover the younger man with his body. Harry’s eyes fluttered open, and he wrapped his arms around Severus’s neck, a soft _Please_ falling from his lips. Severus covered the soft mouth for a slow, lingering kiss, trying to show how much he loved this precious man beneath him without words. Each dip of tongue into the warm cavern was a declaration, each stroke of tongue over tongue was a promise of future pleasure. He gripped the slender hip beneath him, the flesh warm and slick beneath his touch. He moved his hips and felt the tip of his cock press against the slicked hole. Harry’s hands gripped his neck, as if to hurry him along, desperate to feel Severus filling him. He complied, pressing himself forward. Harry pulled his mouth back, gasping for breath as Severus breached him. He pushed in with a soft groan, and closed his eyes at the feeling of Harry surrounding him.

 

_I don't wanna see a thing, baby I just wanna feel your touch, feel your rush,_

_I don't wanna see a thing, I just wanna feel your love_

 

Harry’s breath caught as Severus filled him, stretched him. The man felt amazing!  Harry had never felt so full, so loved. They lay there, silent; adjusting to the new sensations. The sound of their panted breaths filling the room. Almost as soon as he caught his breath, Harry felt Severus begin to move. Long, slow slides in and out of his body. A soft moan slipped from his lips, and one hand slid down to grip the firm shoulder, feeling the muscle move beneath his fingers. Harry wrapped his legs around Severus’s waist, and turned his head to press kisses to the strong arms on either side of him; licking at the heated flesh, and suckling on the salty skin. He let his fingers slide through the dark hair that hung around them like a curtain, seemingly creating a private world. He smiled as his name fell on a rush of air from Severus’s lips. He moaned and pressed up as he felt the heat in his stomach begin to build. Severus took the hint, and sped up his movements, sliding over Harry’s prostate and causing sparks to shoot off behind Harry’s eyelids.

 

_Make my world go black, hit me like a heart attack, knock me flat on my back, yeah_

_Just keep doing that, that thing you're doing there, brush me with your hair, I swear_

_I don't know how long that I can last,_

_Make my world go black, black, make my world black, black_

 

Severus increased the steady rhythm of his movements, and Harry’s hips moved to match the rapid pounding, soft moans falling from the kiss swollen lips. Severus wasn’t sure how much longer he could last. He’d waited so long to make Harry his, making mistakes and trying to push the man away before realizing he was only hurting them both. This was his real apology to Harry, to give the man what they both wanted, needed, so badly. To love Harry with his body, and let the age old dance prove his words. Harry thrashed beneath him before reaching frantically between their sweat-slicked bodies, and taking himself in hand. Severus lifted himself up so he could watch Harry’s frenzied movements. He’d never cared to watch another man bring himself off before, but with Harry he knew he could watch for days. The strong hand sliding over sweat, saliva, and oil-slicked angry red flesh, as Harry gasped and moaned Severus’s name. There was nothing seductive or sexual in the way Harry’s hand moved over himself. It was simply… Harry.  Severus couldn’t keep pace with the hurried movements, but did his best to pound fast and hard into Harry, thrusting against the ever-important bundle of nerves. Hard, fast, as one hand moved to brace against the headboard, giving him leverage as he thrust into the man he loved, sending them both closer to the edge. He felt Harry’s body tense beneath him, and Harry cried out as he erupted, the lithe body convulsing around Severus and sending streams of hot come over their stomachs. He pressed into Harry as the man’s name slipped from his lips, and his own body spilled it’s release. He lowered his head to press a soft kiss to the sweaty temple, and murmured his love as he worked to catch his breath. Eventually he slipped from the body beneath him, and moved to lie beside Harry. He closed his eyes on a satisfied sigh.

 

_Make my world go black_

_I don't wanna see a thing, I just wanna feel your touch, feel your rush_

 

Harry cast a silent cleaning spell, and summoned a blanket. He pulled it over them as he curled into Severus, a happy sigh escaping his lips. Severus wrapped an arm around Harry’s waist, and pressed a kiss to the nape of his neck. Harry smiled softly into the darkness.

“Stay,” he said softly into the blackness.

“Always,” came the whispered reply. He closed his eyes and let the darkness behind his lids fade to white.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again, thanks everyone for seeing me through this experiment. I hope you enjoyed it. I've got a couple of one shots coming up including the Christmas fic I promised. I've also got a new fic starting on the first. It's going to be pretty long and I hope you all enjoy it.


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